Assume Personal Responsibility? Who, Me?
|
|
As thinking, acting human beings we have the ability to choose our response to events, people and circumstances. We do not become responsible when we mature; we mature when we become responsible.
Psychologists teach that the only reasons people are ever motivated or moved to action is to gain a reward or avoid a penalty. As you teach this principal to the children in your charge be sure to explain what they will gain or lose by the choices they make.
Personal Responsiblity is an ever widening circle of people, places and events affected by our decisions. In the center of that circle, an area which many people never get beyond is:
ME: I am in charge of those things that directly affect me as a person. Examples are: Grooming, nutrition, exercise, education, choosing friends, a mate or a career. My choices might irritate or disappoint others but the consequences will ultimately hurt only me.
The next circle of influence is:
YOU: My actions in this circle affect those I love and care about. I want you to like and approve of me, so I am motivated to do what will please you. I have a responsibility to those who work or live with me to do the things I say I will, accept blame when I am wrong, make restitution, be co-operative, care for my possessions and safeguard other people's resources. Consequences have a ripple effect on those around me and will affect my daily life.
And as we mature and become more sensitive, we are concerned about:
US: The community within 10 miles of wherever I am standing determines us. Some people and organizations I know, some I don't know yet, but they are a part of my extended neighborhood. This is the place to practice random acts of kindness, courtesy and service. We are each the representative of the groups we belong to; family, teenagers, school, soccer team etc. The whole may be judged and influenced by our individual actions and role model. The reward may come later in life in the form of recommendations, job offers, networking and a stronger more vibrant community.
The widest rim of the circle is to those we may or may not know:
The Universe: I have a responsibility to the universal family of humankind to make the world a better place. I need to be a part of the solution of preserving the earth, eliminating bigotry, giving service, and treating others, as I would like to be treated. The Universe may never give me a tangible reward, but I will gain an inner reward of doing right and making good choices for the higher good of all. I recognize that I have a responsibility to not only have positive actions, but thoughts, words and intentions towards others and to act with dignity, respect and love.
As parents and leaders we need to give children the opportunity to be responsible as early as possible. Teach the concept of a pause button in order to stop, think and choose before acting. Whenever they are allowed to have a voice and a choice, they will grow up knowing that they have the power to guide the outcome of their life and contribute to the well being of the group.
Assuming personal responsibility is the ultimate goal of growing up. So the answer to the question,Who, me? is Yes, you.
(c) Judy H. Wright, www.ArtichokePress.com
This handout© 2003 has been prepared by Judy H. Wright, Missoula, MT parent educator and author. You may have permission to make copies for other parents and teachers but the entire article, including the signature line, must be included. A complete list of parenting books, aids, workshops and a FREE ezine is available at http://www.ArtichokePress.com. To contact us, please write JudyWright@Artichokepress.com or call 406-549-9813.
|
|
|
Fizzy Sherbet ? A Sweet Science Lesson For Your Kids!
Fizzy sherbet in a paper bag with a strawberry lollipop was probably my favorite treat as a child, but I never knew what was in the sherbet and why it sparkled and tingled on my tongue! Try making some with your kids and enjoy a mini science lesson in the process.The basis of the sherbet is icing sugar (confectioners' sugar). 50g will make enough for about 6 children. For that amount you will also need a scant teaspoon each of bicarbonate of soda and citric acid. You can buy the latter, in the form of a white powder, very cheaply in small quantities from your chemist or pharmacy. Children will also enjoy having a lollipop o...(related: Parenting)
Just What Is A Learning Disability?
A learning disability is defined as a permanent problem that affects a person with average to above average intelligence, in the way that he/she receives, stores, and processes information.
The Different Types, Or Styles, Of Adhd
Research literature, recent books, and common sense, all point to the fact that there are different types, or styles, of ADHD. In the past we referred to Attention Deficit Disorder: Inattentive Type, or Impulsive/Hyperactive Type, or a Combined Type. Today the diagnostic differences are a bit less clear, but the reality doesn't ch...(related: Parenting)
Parenting - The Irrational Vocation
There are some grounds to assume that a cognitive dissonance is involved in feeling that children are more a satisfaction than a nuisance. Why do people bother with pa...(related: Parenting)
Parenting Your Teenager: Back To School Blues
Q: Our son has been in honors classes all through school up until his junior year last year, when his grades took a dive. What could be going on and what can we do about it?A: The cause of suddenly declining grades in school can often be found in one of seven categories.Many times ...(related: Parenting)
Planning The Ultimate Kid Birthday Party
Child Party Planning Guideline #1)Pick the ThemeYour child is going to look forward to their birthday months before it arrives. Starting from their last birthday and after every friend's birthday they attend through the year, they will continuously ask the same question, "Is it my birthday tomorrow?" Let them know how important their birthday is and make sure they are apart of the planning process. Start by choosing their birthday theme with them.Every child is different, including siblings. You'll want to choose a theme that is unique to what your child is currently involved ...(related: Parenting)
How Children Learn
Nurture and TeachThe single most important thing caregivers can do for a child is provide a nurturing environment. By doing this, we influence children's brain development and their ability to learn. Introducing nurtured children to learning opportunities every day will help them become happy, well-adjusted adults. In all stages of child development, each experience builds on the one before it. The most basic foun...(related: Parenting)
Valuable Parenting Tip
Very often, new parents rely on a parenting tip or two which is passed to them by their own folks, who are now grandparents and usually have plenty of reliable advice to share. If this sort of parenting tip and advice is not available however, new parents could run into all sorts of problems while trying to raise a healthy baby.Attending a few lessons at a parenting class where valuable knowledge and all kinds of parenting tips are passed along and...(related: Parenting)
Registering A Birth In Scotland
Who Can Register A Birth?The child's mother or father should register the birth within 21 days. However, a father who is not married to the child's mother can only register a birth and be named on the birth certificate as the father if:
- he jointly signs the register with the mother, or
- a court has declared that he is the father, or
- the mother and he jointly sign a declaration available from the Registrar.
- any person present at the birth,...(related: Parenting)
Your Checking Account
Checking accounts are an absolute necessity these days. You can either have a checking account or run to the bank or other outlet for money orders. Many people pay for almost everything with a check including groceries, gas, clothes and a long list of other things. When you add an ATM card to this picture, your chances for a potential problem is greatly enhanced.Don't get me wrong. There are many people that can keep their check book up to date, even deducting all of the ATM advances and automatic withdrawals as they make them. However, too many people that write checks for everything wind up not entering a check when it is written or an ATM advance when it is made. The result is a bounced check fee ...(related: Parenting)
Featured Article On Parenting: The Power Of Belonging
Search for Assurance: The Power of BelongingThe job hunt is on, as is the quest to find another great preschool and neighborhood to be part of. After feeling out of place, hearing over and over that an item I'm searching for is not available, or a pretty basic procedure I thought I had a grasp of is "done differently here. You must be from overseas," I'm really glad to be back.It's as I suspected-we each have a checklist of things we rely on to assure us that all is okay. For my elderly aunt, reciting the family tree mentally anchors her in the family, and strengthens her sense of belonging to it. I never understood before, but she has actually memorized the biographical details of most of the family members. She orients herself by acknowledging aloud who's married to whom, who's building, and how many children they ha...(related: Parenting)
To Test Or Not To Test - That Is The Question
Little Suzy has really been having a hard time getting some of her assignments done. When she reads in class, she struggles with many words, and her mother reported at conference time that Suzy spends hours each night on homework.
At the same time, Suzy carries on intelligent conversation, and when you ask her about what she learned from the class, she has some good feedback. She is getting excellent grades in math class and, when she does experiments in science class, she knows exactly what to do and gets great results.
You've tho...(related: Parenting)
What Values Are We Giving Our Children?
On a bright Sunday morning, a couple of weeks ago, I went to South London to receive a message sent from Nigeria. As I entered the lift, I saw a couple, apparently in their early 20s, smoking marijuana while their young son sat comfortably in his push-chair. As I was going down through the staircase, I saw another three children in their teens smoking marijuana and drinking beer.The above situation depicts the state of our children abroad. What values are we giving our children in foreign lands? Is it the environment or our work that forbids us from giving our children good values, home training, love and care? Or did we dump the values we were brought up with at the airport as we boarded the aircraft to England?Agreed, many parents work har...(related: Parenting)
site-map - Copyright © 2006 | Contact Webmaster | Baby Care Info | All Rights Reserved. | Parenting